How to help your team members get “unstuck”
How to help your team members get “unstuck”
5 minutes
Whenever team members encounter a problem, a challenge, or a difficulty, they become stuck. And when they get stuck, they stop performing and do not meet expectations. The uncertainty can be overwhelming, and sometimes paralysing for some people, but it doesn’t mean that you need to help resolve it for them.
Your instinct as the leader is to help them resolve the issue and get them out of that situation. But does it really help? If you continue to do things for your team, they will not grow. Worse is that they will develop a sort of reliance on you to help them every time they get stuck. They won’t learn because they have developed the mindset that they don’t need to learn new things since they have their leaders to solve their issues all the time.
So when your team encounters a hiccup, should you help or not? If yes, up to what degree and what kind of help do you extend? How do you let them understand what’s keeping them stuck and how do you teach them how to overcome these obstacles themselves?
When individuals encounter challenges, leaders tend to rush to solve problems for them and push solutions into their hands without asking them what they need. And in our eagerness to help, we fail to realise that they’re starting to shut us off. It’s because they don’t get what they really need, which is clarity of the situation and understanding the reason behind the problem. We are in a hurry to resolve the issue that we overlook the fact that the team member doesn’t fully understand the situation he is in because we didn’t give them the opportunity to fix things themselves.
You might believe what you’re doing is for the best because, hey, the issue was resolved quickly and efficiently! But think about how your team member might feel being in that difficult situation and not knowing the right thing to do. The situation might appear clear and simple for you, but it might appear foggy to them. So even though you’ve helped resolve the situation, it creates a feeling of disconnect and ambiguity for your team members, and this makes them reluctant to accept your help the next time.
If you find yourself trying to fix the problem for your team member, step back, check your behaviour, and ask yourself these questions:
It is easy to make assumptions about what happened and jump to finding an answer to other people’s problems. But we don’t know everything, do we? This can lead to misunderstandings and ineffective solutions. We might not be aware of all the factors influencing a situation, and jumping to conclusions can result in misguided efforts to address the issue. Each person’s experience is unique, and the reasons behind their challenges may be complex and multifaceted. The best way to understand the situation is to ask the right questions.
Focus on “What” questions. Refrain from asking “Why” questions because they can make people feel defensive. They may come across as an inquiry into someone’s motives or decision-making, which can be perceived as judgmental. Individuals may feel as though their actions are being scrutinised or criticised. They might also feel pressured to justify their actions or choices, leading to a defensive response.
“What” questions, on the other hand, focus on gathering information without implying blame. “What” questions are often open-ended and this approach promotes a more rational and less emotional response. Encourage them to think about the details and facts, instead of rationalising what they’ve done.
Knowing the right type of support to give depends on the situation and the person who needs it. If you think your team member would benefit from subtle guidance and suggestions, they would appreciate a “nudger”. Nudging is effective in situations where people need help considering various options and when people value autonomy in decision-making. But if you think your team member needs emotional support and reassurance, being a “comforter” would be valuable. This is true if the person is going through emotionally challenging situations, such as dealing with stress, loss, or personal struggles.
But if you think you need to use a direct approach, a “confronter” would be a perfect wake-up call or reality check. It can be effective in situations where action is required, and complacency or avoidance needs to be addressed. This approach is suitable for those who respond well to assertiveness and straightforwardness.
Take note, however, that a well-rounded support system may include a mix of nudging, comforting, modeling, and, occasionally, a more direct approach when the situation warrants it. The key is to tailor your support to the specific needs and communication style of the person seeking guidance.
Once you’ve figured out the reason why your team member is stuck, the next step is to help them come up with solutions to their issues. Offer assistance in the form of resources or, collaboratively working on problem-solving to foster a sense of empowerment and shared responsibility for improvement.
Don’t forget to monitor their progress. Schedule regular check-ins to track progress and make adjustments to strategies as needed. This ongoing support and communication help maintain momentum and address new challenges that may arise. And don’t be stingy with positive feedback. It serves as a powerful motivator and reinforces your team’s efforts. You’ll be surprised at how fast your team’s growth will be if everyone is empowered and motivated to resolve their challenges.
